When I'm With You. . .

Some roads are rough and rocky

Some very narrow to get through

Traveling by roads,skies and seas

It always leads back to you

You are my beacon light

That shines through every storm

You are there by the fire

That keeps our house a home

You walk with me each day

Through happiness and pain

You are my sheltering umbrella

Whenever there is rain

No matter where I travel

Where ever in the world I roam

I have the inner knowledge

That I will never lose my way

Because all roads lead back to you

And the place we call our HOME...

The Long Way Home

My heart's in a fog

On the journey we've taken

Almost a year

Since I saw your precious face.

Darkness envelopes my soul

As you lie enshrouded

Both alone

Yet together.

I'll always remember

Happier Days

When your silky fur

Soothed my weary soul.

Your dancing eyes

Watched o'er me

Ever the Mama

Always the friend.

You and I forever together

'Til the end.

Six Days Before The End

Lately, I've been in a funk.  Weepy, sad, lethargic and more.  Like my life has come to a halt.  Worse. Like it's regressing, going backwards, into the muck, mire, abyss.  Ever feel like that?


Can't help thinking it has something to do with Suzy's anniversary death-date.  Last year, at this time, she was withering away, being carried out in a sling to do her business 3 times a day and sleeping a lot.  Yet, she still looked beautiful.  Her reddish silky coat looked a bit thinner but none the worse for wear.  The color still radiant, the white still bright, her ears tipped symmetrically, her smile wide and honest.  For, she was a magnificent creature through-and-through.  From the day she was born 'til the day she died.

 In fact, I daresay I haven't met anyone or any animal as inately gorgeous as Suzy.  From her black button nose to the tip of her tri-colored, bushy tail, she was perfection with  personality to match,  Delightful, winsome, charming, wise.  Super intelligent and kind-hearted to the core.  Ever protective, always alert.  My closest companion, dearest darling, faithful friend.  To the end.                        And, beyond. . .

A Year and Ten Days

A year and ten days ago, my love was with me.  We were still "us."  A team.  Best friends.  Lovers. How time flies.  Doesn't seem that long ago that Suzy was always by my side.  How difficult those last days were.  Seeing her decline day-after-day, almost minute-by-minute.  Shrinking.  Having more trouble walking yet bravely enduring the "saddle sling" in which I lifted her in and out of the house.  It was hard.  On both of us.


Yet we persevered.  We knew our time was quickly slipping away.  The grim reaper loomed large and unrelating right outside our door.  As Suzy declined so did my spirits.  When she died so did part of me.


I worried how "the end" would finally arrive.  Would I have to put her down to stop her suffering, this magnificent creature who had been with me, through thick and thin, for the past 13 years?  She came to me at 13 months, the divison of a couple who was divorcing and gave her back to the breeder.  She was then advertised through the sheltie rescue team, with the breeder having final say of who "adopted" Suzy.


Of the many people who applied, I was chosen.  Mrs. Heck saw something in me that she wanted for Suzy.  Some connection that transcended simple care and kindness.  Something that told her I would be the best place for Suzy to share her life. 


We traveled to Vermont twice.  Tooled around country inns, town greens, Bingo parlors, tag sales and potluck suppers.  We hiked up Mt. Tom, wandered down winding roads and drove all around the Green Mountains.  We met so many friendly folks who welcomed us into their hearts and homes.  Suzy was a natural at making friends and paved the way for us to meet many wonderful folks along the way.


She helped me grow in so many ways:  emotionally, spiritually, profoundly. And I'd like to think I made her life happier, too.  From the hundreds of photos I took of  those laughing eyes, smiling lips, radiant energy, it appears so. 


A friend.  A mentor. A confidante. My second skin. Intimate shadow. Saint. Sprite. Light. My darling.  My true love.  How time has passed yet stood still since you left my life. 


But never my heart.

My Darling Suzy