Her simple existence gave my life meaning and purpose, unconditional love, abundant happiness. These, in turn, helped me feel good about myself, have more confidence, and feel less alone in the world. Now, I am.
Suzy was more of everything to me. More than just a dog. More loving than anyone else in my life, more loyal,, more honest, more consistent, more dependable, more affectionate, more protective, more irresistable, more devoted, more companionable, more beautiful, more reliable, more trustworthy, more unselfish, more comical, more intelligent.
I still look around for that darling face, that full and shiny coat, that enthusiatic bark, that uplifting personality and that reliable partner. And I can't find her. Or myself. We're both missing. Today the sun is shining but not in my heart. I miss that pup more than words can say. I know this sounds rather repetitive and I apologize, dear reader, but I can't help it. My heart is broken, and I can think of little else than Suzy. Please understand.
Have you ever lost a furry friend? How did you feel? How long did it take until you felt yourself, again? I feel part of my Self has died. I can't imagine life without Suzy. She was my reason d'etre, my guiding light, my deepest love. I may not see her in the foyer, but I shall forever see her in my dreams.
2 comments:
Hang in there. I know its hard. I am here for you. Just recently three of my friens lost their pets. They are like family and become a part of you. I understand how you feel.
Maria
Hello Phyll,
My heart goes out to you - may the happy beautiful memories bring comfort to you.
Two things come to mind this morning.
In 1999, I realized there was a profound difference between prolonging life and prolonging death - this helped me to take the decision to euthanise our sweet dog Buffy who had given us so much joy since adopting her at about three months until her passing at 12 years old.
Since then I've come to first believe and then know that energy never dies, it just changes form. This knowledge gives me peace and helps me to stay open to the changed / changing forms.
I've spent a long time fearing death. The experience with Buffy ten years ago, and another this spring with our 18 year-old cat, Georgia, have helped me - in ways I'm only coming to know - to see the examples of animals, their purity, their lovingness, their immediacy, and their full embrace of life.
With sympathy,
Leslie
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